Being a “people-pleaser” is the worst thing you could ever be…
…and sensational headlines are an incredibly cheap way to gain an audience, but now that I have you here, here’s what I’ve been thinking today:
Of all the things I’ve learned in my almost thirty years of existence, few have been as significant as the realization of just how dangerous it is to be a people-pleaser.
I don’t think it’s at all a coincidence that creative-types are frequently people-pleasers. All art is is an extension of oneself, put on a platter, and thrown to the wolves. It’s an intimate and fragile cosmic thingy, guarded by layers of self-doubt, that when gifted to an audience, comes with a note that says, “how much am I worth?” The moment you give it away, you have no power. It’s both a terrifying and liberating experience.
When confined to a specific task, putting something out into the world for validation isn’t doom and gloom. When everything you do and every decision you make has to pass through a filter of “what would he/she/they think?”, now it’s paralysis.
If you want to make noise in this world, you need to cause a disturbance. That’s what noise is. If you want to cause change, you need to cause change. If you want to do something that hasn’t been done before, lots of people will not be pleased. Anything that is new or different instills in us a sense of fear, fear of the unknown. People were afraid of fire before they were afraid of electricity before they were afraid of computers before they were afraid of surveillance. I for one am terrified of the developments in virtual reality and artificial intelligence. I’ve learned enough now to know that on the other side of that fear is excitement and wonder. I could fall out of bed, crack my head open and die, just as easily as I could be vaporized by a sentient robot. It all ends the same. Admittedly though, If my end comes at the metal hands of a robot, that would be a super-cool way to go.
What is the point of any of this? I was hoping you were paying attention, because I haven’t been.
If you want to live a small, safe, and comfortable life, by all means do so. There really is no right or wrong way to live your life. If you want to do something big, however, understand and make peace with the fact that some, if not many people won’t be pleased.
P.S. If your attention span is as short as mine, know that I genuinely appreciate the immense effort it took to read this whole thing.